NeekerBreeker (skinship) wrote in ficbitch_anon,

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Look Into My Chin-Eyes and Tell Me You Love Me

And here's the second part of the fourth chapter. I'm off to pour bleach into my ear now.

Tsuzuki's POV:

It is getting dark out and I have no where to go. [Uh. And where are you now, exactly?] I don't want to go back home where Tatsumi will yell at me for being stupid at work again. [Y'know, like Tatsumi usually does, flying off the handle for any old reason. Boo, Tatsumi! Hey, let's all spit on him again! I bet I can hit his eye!]

He just doesn't understand that I put on that act to keep me sane. [Nobody understaaaaaands meeeeee and my endless whiiiiiiniiiiiing.] Walking up to a mansion, [Some mansion. Any mansion. Look, it's a mansion surrounded by darkness; don't make me describe anything, okay?] I ring the door bell. I think, "I hope he is home and I'm not waking him up."

Muraki answers the door with a surprise look, ["What am I doing in a mansion in the dark? Aren't I dead? Oh, it's another useless dream sequence. Better act accordingly."] "Hello, Mr. Tsuzuki. Please come in."

He moves to the side to let me in and I walk inside while listening to the door being shut. [What an interesting sound it makes, as it somehow manages to close while I'm walking through it.] It is strange how I decided to come to him. It was two days ago that we met each other again after two years. [Oh, thanks. Now I at least know when this dream sequence takes place.] Why was he at that bar in the first place? That place didn't seem like a place Muraki would go to. We walk into the living room [of the mansion. Does Muraki really live in a goddamn mansion? And if Tsuzuki knows where it is, how come no one else at Enma-chou does?] and I see pictures of him when he was younger with Oriya. [They're not hung on the walls or on the desk or anywhere, I just... see them, hovering in the air. Come to think of it, this mansion of darkness might be haunted.] Smiling at them, I think, "Well he looked happy with Oriya when they were younger." [When he was younger, with Oriya. Oh, those halcyon days when Muraki was young with Oriya, and him and Oriya were young together. Those were the days, the days of youth and Oriya and can we please move on now?]

Muraki breaks the silence, "How did you find where I lived, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Feeling the heat raise [the undead from their graves] to my cheeks, I whisper in a low tone, "I followed you home yesterday." [Oh! If only someone would've come to think of that; they might've caught Muraki earlier!] He raises an eyebrow at me and I hide my face from his stare.

He walks to me and turns my chin to look at him [and my chin blinks its chin-eyes, obediently meeting his gaze] as he replies, "I did not hear what you said, Mr. Tsuzuki." [Answer me, bitch, or it's whip-time in the mansion of darkness!]

Moving my foot back and forth, [I do the hokey-pokey and I shake it all about!] I whisper a little louder for him to hear me, "I followed you home yesterday." [Sorry, Dr. Rape, sir. I guess I'm going to have to be spanked now. But please don't twist the nipple-clamps so hard this time, sir. I'll go chain myself to the wall like a good boy.]

He chuckles and releases my chin from his soft pale fingers as he resorts, "Making sure I am not killing anyone, Mr. Tsuzuki."

Shaking my head, I think, "I don't [give a fuck about you murdering innocent people anymore. Neither my job nor my relationship mean a thing to me. All I want is for you to buttsex me into oblivion and back.] even know why I believed that he stopped completely from killing, but something in those eyes told me that he was stating the truth."

[Hmm... I don't know. Something in those eyes tells me it's MURDERING TIME!]

He is staring at me and it is making me nervous. Looking around, I ask, "Why are you staring at me?"

He takes a seat on a white couch while answering, "I was trying to figure out why you are here, Mr. Tsuzuki and slowly undressing you." [And peeling this carrot and warming the lube and walking the dog, too! Aren't I wonderfully efficient?]

Watching him grin at me, I blush from the straightforward comment. He tilts his head to watch my every movement and I start to wonder why did I come to a pervert like him. ["Pervert"? That's the best word you can find?] Some small voice speaks in my mind, "Because you want to fuck him and wanted to for a long time." [Shh! Go away, author! Not now!] Shaking my head to clear those thoughts, I ask, "Why were you at that bar?"

Muraki answers while taking a glass of wine from the small wooden table next to the couch, [as all of it simply materialised there] "The same as you, Mr. Tsuzuki. I had a busy and hard day at the hospital and needed some time to relax." He takes a slip [SIP. SIP. SIP. How can you not know how "sip" is spelled? Were you raised by wolves?] of wine before continuing, "I must admit it was not a place that I would ever go to, but it was close and it was raining."

Walking to the couch and taking a seat next to Muraki, I ask, "Is it all right if I talk to you?" He gives me a strange look ["You ARE talking to me. Unless you mean... oh! Personal revelation time! Well, let me just put on my best Dr. Rape silk boxers and let my Healing Cock shine its ever-loving light on you!"] and I explain, "I'm feeling depressed."

He sighs as he replies, "I guess you are upset about something with Mr. Tatsumi."

Looking at the fire place, I resort, "Yeah. I guess." He turns my chin to face him [and my chin obeys, even though it's getting really fed up with having its beauty sleep interrupted all the time] and blushes his soft rosy lips against mine in a gentle way that I think this is not Muraki [but a pwetty, pwetty pwincess with wosy lips] at first. Grabbing onto his arms, I whisper, "I'm so tired, Muraki." He embraces me and my head lies on his chest while I cry from all the pain that I have been holding onto for as long as I can remember. [Oh, wah, wah, wah. You'll get your buttsexin' soon enough, and your life will finally be complete.]

Muraki finally speaks up after a half of an hour of silence, [And we all know that when we break down crying, we're meticulously keeping track of time, aren't we?] "What were you two fighting about? If you do not care to speak of it, then it is all right."

Looking up to Muraki to see a sadness [No! Not the s-word! Aaargh!] that I have never seen before on Muraki's face, I whisper, "We were fighting about how I work." The tears flow down my face once again and he wipes them away. Staring at the fire place, I explain, "He doesn't understand that I act that way because it is the only way to keep me sane. [Only stupidity can save my sanity. It's a fantastic plan I came up with shortly after drilling holes into my head with rusty equipment. Why can't my boyfriend read my miiiiind? Why must I explain these things to hiiiiiim? Why why whiiiiiiiine!] Do you understand what I mean?"

He answers while rubbing his hand through my hair, "Yes. You act the way you do to prevent yourself getting drawn into the pain. It is natural to do that, Mr. Tsuzuki. [In this universe, anyway. It's perfectly natural to act in ways so fundamentally stupid that even the most patient, forgiving characters start yelling at you for it. Trust our author. She knows these things.] He just does it differently than you do."

Observing the room, I notice a bottle of wine on the table near the chair in the corner. I ask in a low tone, "Why were you drinking, Muraki?" [Ohmigod where did you get WINE? I'm gonna call Stacey and Mary-Ann and then we can all drink the wine and get TOTALLY drunk! Tee hee!]

He looks over at the table as he responds, "I lost a patient today and their family was not too pleased with it." [That's the only reason why adults ever drink wine. I know I can't have a Mojito before I've accidentally run over at least three people.]

Wrapping my arms around his waist, I whisper in his ear, "I'm sorry." [Oh no! The crazy serial killer's patient d-d-died! How will he GO ON?!] He shakes his head to tell me I did nothing wrong. Then again, I could have been the one who had to take the life of his patient. [WHAT. Tsuzuki, reality check: YOU are not the murderer in this room, HE is.] Feeling the guilt inside raise to the surface, I whisper while tears roll down my face, "Was your patient's name Qu Manner?" [Maybe he died because the hyperspace tunnel from the Starship Enterprise didn't function properly. Honestly, Qu Manner? This is still ordinary modern-day Japan, isn't it?]

He looks down at me [from high above. Wait, when did he jump up to swing from the chandelier?] and pulls me closer to his body, "You did nothing wrong. [I have to keep telling you this, otherwise you really think each and every death in the world is your fault. Hey, Tsuzuki, do you miss your spine? I do.] He was living when he should have died a while ago. [Like all my patients. MWA HA HA HA-- Um, I mean, how sad.] Please stop doing this to yourself, Mr. Tsuzuki."

Pulling away from him, I ask, "How can you justify me killing him?"

Muraki gives me an angry look [Even Muraki is getting fed up with Tsuzuki's endless whining and pity parties.] before speaking, "You were not responsible when he had an illness that was making him suffer. You gave him peace, Mr. Tsuzuki." He takes a deep breath before he replies with a gentle voice, "Forgive my outburst, Mr. Tsuzuki. As a doctor, I saw his suffering a lot more than his family would ever accept." [Muraki knows his patients better than their families do. Muraki is just that special! And the author is not at all in love with this character, oh heavens no.]

Shaking my head and giving him a sad smile, I reply, "I can't say I understand what it is like to be a doctor with seeing patients die every day. [But I can completely understand your need to kill innocent civilians, experiment on humans and rape and curse children. It's the doctor part I'm having some trouble properly sympathising with!] I'm sorry if I upset you, Muraki." He smiles at me and touches my face with his pale warm hand [Okay, Muraki is pale! He graduated from Anne Rice School of Hotness! We get it!] while turning to his touch. [Muraki is turning to his own touch?] I move my face closer to his to kiss him and try to forget our pain, I hear my cell phone go off. [Cell phones give me pain! Horrible, terrible pain!] Looking down at the caller ID, I see the house phone's number [...House phone?] and answer, "Hello."

Tatsumi responds, "Where the hell are you!?" [I'm currently in OOC Land, but where are you? Are you throwing a pity party at some serial killer's mansion again? I warned you the last time!]

Jumping slightly from the tone in my lover's voice, [I know I did.] I answer, "Walking around."

He sighs as he resorts, "It is almost two in the morning and you have to be in work on time tomorrow."

Raising my voice as I resort, "Damn it! I will be on time! Leave me the hell alone and fuck off, [Mum! I hate you! You don't understand me! I'm gonna run away from home! I'm sixteen, I'm old enough to take care of myself!] Siichiro! [His. Name. Is. SEIICHIROU.]" Hanging up the phone while tears roll down my face, I look at Muraki's face to see worry in his eyes. Why can't I be with someone who understands me? [Because you're a lying, selfish slut in this fic. Maybe you and the pale psycho deserve each other.] Why do I fight with Tatsumi all the time? I have never said those things to Tatsumi before and I know if I go home now that we will have it out for the entire place to hear it.

Muraki offers, "You may stay for the night." [Smooth move! Get your foot in the door while he's emotionally vulnerable!]

Wiping my tears from my eyes, [Aren't your eyes fucking dry by now?] I ask, "Are you sure?" He nods his head to me and I hug him so tight that he might stop breathing. [...Please?] Releasing him from my hug [Damn.], I reply, "Thank you. [Oh, what would I do without you, Dr. Rape? No one manipulates me and supports my infantile behaviour like you!]"

He gives me a kind smile while mumbling, "There is no reason for you to thank me. It is the least I can do. [You're so selfless, Muraki. Really. Let's give the man a Nobel prize.]"

Leaning into him, I brush my lips against his soft warm lips to kiss him. [Instead of those other times, when I brush my lips against other people's lips in order to dance the Funky Chicken.] He slowly starts to unbutton my shirt. This is wrong, but then why does this feel so right and good? [We've been over this! Because a) you are a slut and you only care about buttsexing Muraki, b) Muraki is emotionally manipulating you, being his own sociopathic self. Any more questions?] Helping him take off my shirt, I mumble, "Muraki."

He pulls back and whispers, "Sorry, Mr. Tsuzuki." He picks up my shirt and hands it to me as he replies, "I am sorry. I should not have let it go that far." [Ooh, he's playing the "Acting Noble" card. The guy's a pro.]

Staring at him with sadness [Tell you what. When I finally get to the end of this torturous fic, I will count how many times that damn word showed up. If it was over a hundred, I'm going to treat myself to a whole bottle of vodka. Until then, I'll just stick to grinding my teeth.] in my eyes, I think, "I did something wrong. I made him upset and now he will tell me to get lost." My sobs wreck my body and I try to hide my face from him. [Look, if you can't find your spine, Tsuzuki, use this broom here. Just try not to be such a tearbag, okay? Jesus.]

He pulls my chin to look at him and [the chin protests at being constantly yanked about] asks, "What is wrong, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Laying my head against his shoulder, I stutter, "I . . . I ma . . . de you . . . yo . . . u upset." [Shit. The Stuttering Virus is here. For your own sake, Muraki, wear a condom. Otherwise, you might not speak a complete word ever again.] He lifts my chin up and [it slaps his hand away, finally deciding that enough is enough] wipes away my tears while giving me a sad smile. Why do I need my enemy to touch me and make me feel again? [You want to feel MORE? You're worse than a bundle of nerves rolled in PMS and left in a room full of chocolate and teary romantic dramas.]

He whispers in my ear, "That is not what I am upset about, Mr. Tsuzuki. I was ready to take advantage of you and I will not do that to you. I will never hurt you again. I will not allow myself to do that again." [It's not my fault I rape and kill people! It's my... self, the bastard! Sometimes I just can't control him.] He stands up and holds out his hand for me while replying, "I will get you some blankets and I have a guest room you may use for the night." [Going for the Gentleman move, now. You're an expert at this, Dr. Rape!]

Shaking my head at him, I ask in a timid voice, "Can I stay with you?"

He gives me a surprise look before answering, "Mr. Tsuzuki, I might not be able to control myself if you are that close to me." [Goodness, I might be... enticed to violate your precious maidenhood!]

Turning my face to look at the floor, [even though my chin is still protesting and now my cheeks are also getting cranky] I ask in a fearful voice, "What if I don't care if we have sex?" The heat raises to my face once again [Oh! Oh my! I said the word "sex" aloud!] [Honestly, it's not the fucking Victorian era. The gentleman's uncontrollable passions, the utterly sexless and passive maiden who finds herself surrendering to the mercies of said gentleman... How many bad romance novels have you read, author?] and my body feels on fire. Feeling his warm breath against my neck, I think, "If I did this, will I be able to live with that fact for the rest of my afterlife?" Raising my head to stare at Muraki, I think as I check out my worst enemy, "Yes, I can." [After all, he's hot!] He pushes me back on the couch and climbs on top of me. Feeling the silk shirt [Silk, but of course! Muraki in fact consists entirely of silk. He's made by special silkworms which are kept in the dark and fed moonpie and rapecakes.] against my bare chest makes my body react in ways I can't explain. [What would an innocent maiden like me understand of the strange world of manly passions?] What has Muraki done to me to want his touch? His soft lips [Okay, I get it, he uses Blistex!] move against my neck and down my chest. Buckling up against the warmth of the body on top of me, I hear him moan. Looking up at his eyes, [somehow, while he's still busily kissing down my chest,] I think, "I wonder what I did to make him react that way. He seems to enjoy it." [Oh dear! I do believe the gentleman on top of me is aroused!]

Muraki stands up and explains, "If this is what you want, then I will not stop. Are you sure, Mr. Tsuzuki?"

Replying while I sit up on the couch, "Yes."

He gives me a real smile [instead of all the fake ones before that really won my heart] and replies, "I will be right back, Mr. Tsuzuki."

Nodding my head, I mumble, "Okay." He walks out the room and I take a seat on the carpet floor next to the fire place where I will be warm. I miss his warmth. [They're really going to make sweet love by the fireplace, aren't they? Where's Chef and his mood music?] Waiting about ten minutes, I hear Muraki walk in the room with a couple of thick blankets and I smile at him. He lays one down on the ground [now that the floor and the carpet have mysteriously disappeared. Wacky things happen in the mansion of darkness!] and pulls me towards his embrace. He is being so nice to me.

He asks, "Are you sure about this, Asato?" [JUST GET TO THE SEXING.]

Nodding my head as I think, "I love hearing my name roll of his tongue." My thoughts start to go to how he can use that tongue to please me into bliss. My shaking hands go up to unbutton his shirt to feel his well-built upper body. [The architect who designed this framework must've been a genius! Why, by standing behind Muraki's wondrous chest, one can survive a hurricane and an earthquake alike!] I come across a scar on the side of his stomach. Slowly rubbing my finger around the scar tissue, I whisper, "I'm sorry for doing this to you. [It's just that at the time I thought I had to stop murderers from killing more innocent people. Silly me, huh?]" The scar that I left him with when I was ready to end his life with my own. I had no right to end his life with mine even if he was the one who drove me into insanity. [I agree that you don't seem to have any rights when it comes to Muraki in this fic. You have to constantly apologise for everything in his presence.]

He takes my hand and kisses it lightly before replying, "It does not bother me, Asato. To be honest, it showed me something. You gave me back my life when you did this and for that I will always be in your debt. [Whenever life gets me down, just make sure to try to burn me alive, will ya, hon? I find it gives me a nice boost.]"

Sliding his shirt off his shoulder, I moan as he bites softly against my neck. We both need to forget our pain. We are both the same.

Waking up with a warm feeling in my pants, I think, "Great. [Another stupid dream sequence and I pissed myself in my sleep again!] Now, I'm dreaming about sex with Kazutaka." That dream felt so real, but it did happen after all. Standing up and walking to the bathroom to clean myself up, I look into the mirror. How long can I keep this up? It is already time to head back to work. Hearing a soft knock on the bedroom door, I think, "Soka is here already." Walking into the room again, I answer the door to find that I was right and replying, "Let's get to work." Hisoka nods his head and gives me a worry look. [Is that pee on your pyjama pants? Goddamn, Tsuzuki, I know this is a tough time for you but for God's sake change your pants at least.]

Chief Konoe's POV: [We have to be inside every head mentioned in this fic, it seems.]

Sitting down while watching Tatsumi pace the office, I think, "He is really worried about Tsuzuki. Then again so am I. If he really felt love for Muraki and to lose him like this, he will not be up for any assignments." [I'll just arrange the universe to bend according to his whims, too. Poor, poor Tsuzuki. I'll forget everything else and concentrate on making sure he gets his num-nums and din-dins and beddie-byes.] I'm just glad there are not any at this point. How long will it take to get back our Tsuzuki? Hearing the door open, I look up from my papers to see Tsuzuki walk in with Hisoka. Tsuzuki turns his face from me and Hisoka stares at us. I speak up, "I'm sorry, Tsuzuki. Tatsumi told me what happened and don't worry you two. I'll not tell anyone about it. [And here's a cake and a book filled with pictures of happy, colourful animals. Try to forget how the BIGGEST ENEMY YOUR DEPARTMENT HAS FACED IN AGES was killed and concentrate on the good things in life, will you, Tsuzuki? Hmm?]"

Tsuzuki gives me a surprise look and mumbles, "Thank you, boss."

Shaking my head, I reply, "You and the kid are family to us and don't you two forget that." Hisoka gives me a smile. It must feel good for him to have a family in us and to know that we are here for him. A young girl with red hair appears before our eyes and I ask, "Who are you?" [Here we fucking go again.]

She bows her head to me and replies, "My name is Ketessa Tsuzuki. It is a pleasure to meet you, Chief Konoe." [I will now commence destroying this entire world and laying waste to everything you hold dear. Oh wait, that's not until three o'clock, sorry. Carry on.]

What did she say her last name is? Looking at Tsuzuki and her again, I think, "She does look like him. Well, at least in the eyes." [AAARGH!]

Tsuzuki asks with concern in his voice, "Are you okay?"

She turns to him and smiles while answering, "Yes, father. I am fine. [I'm glad I've managed to train you so well in such a short time. Now heel! Shake!] I just wanted to make sure that you were all right." [Is it some kind of a Tsuzuki family trait to compulsively check that everybody is okay all the time?]

I don't believe that she is fine. Her eyes betray her answer. It the same with Tsuzuki. They are truly alike [I KNOW THEY ARE. I'm printing those tee-shirts right now.] and I can't believe what Tatsumi told me about her being Tsuzuki's daughter is true. [I can't wrap my mind round it. I was so sure each and everyone in Enma-chou was a certified bum bandit.]

She explains, "I cannot stay to long. [Thank you, Disco Jesus.] I have other business to attend to, but I came to make sure you will be fine. Please do not give up hope."

Tsuzuki asks with a hopeful voice, "Is Kazutaka coming back?" [Can I has? Right now? I want I want it I want it! Otherwise I'll hold my breath again!]

She answers with sadness in her voice, "I do not know that answer. [YES YOU DO, YOU LYING CUNT. *cough* I mean, that's not what Lord Enma said...] I am sorry that I cannot answer."

She disappears and I see the concern in Tsuzuki's eyes. I guess I would feel the same way for my child. Then again, I feel that every day with everyone in my department. In a way, they are like my children. [It's such a hard job, keeping all these infantile shinigami fed and burped and tucked safely in their little nappy-time cradles.] Clearing my throat, I reply, "There is nothing for you to do here. So, go home and rest some more. [I just like to call you into my office in the morning for shits and giggles. I didn't actually have anything to tell you. Ha! Fell for it!]"

Tsuzuki mumbles, "Thank you for understanding, boss."

Watching him walk out without the kid following, I ask Hisoka, "Is he really all right, kid?"

Hisoka shrugs his shoulders as he replies, "I don't think so, sir. He has been having dreams about the time he has spent with Muraki [and I'd really rather not know the details, but he's decided to share, apparently] and it is taking it's toll on him."

[Basically, this Konoe's POV told us absolutely nothing. Great.]

Tsuzuki's POV:

I never thought everyone would be so understanding. [Neither did I. But the author has decided that you're a frail little flower and must be coddled.] Terazuma walks to me and gives me an annoyed look. Sighing to myself, I think, "Well, here is one that won't understand a damn thing." [At last! Someone whose reaction I can angst about! Oh, it's all so unfair, with almost one person in the entire universe not understanding the paaaain I suffer!]

He asks, "Where have you been?"

Seeing Wakaba walking into the office, I answer, "Please don't start, Hajime." Wakaba walks to me and puts a hand on my shoulder. I shake my head to tell her I don't want to talk about it. [Can't you see I'm trying to angst here? Jesus.]

Terazuma speaks up with a concern voice, "Listen, just because we don't get along, doesn't mean anything. [Wow, this dialogue is so natural it grows moss!] We all are worried about you." He sighs before he replies, "If you disappeared from our lives, we would have no more fun and I would be bored as hell. I wouldn't have anyone to tease and it would get out of hand because tight ass." [...Because tight ass. Okay then. Glad we cleared that up.]

Smiling and chuckling at him, I resort, "Thanks, Terazuma." Waving to them, I walk out the office to head back to my apartment. I am glad Tatsumi got me my old apartment back. [It's great how I still make him do everything for me, even though we're not even together anymore. When that toilet clogs in the middle of the night, Tatsumi is your man!] Looking to the sky, I think, "I wouldn't want Tatsumi to see the pain in my eyes for another man. He still needs time." [So now you start paying attention to his feelings?]

A silk voice asks, "What are you thinking about, my dear Asato?" [Oh no. Somebody kill those goddamn worms.]

Frozen in place, I think, "I have just lost my mind. [Nope, that was about four chapters ago, actually.] I'm hearing things now." Turning around slowly to see my love in front of my eyes, [sitting right there on my nose] I whisper, "Yep, I just lost my mind. My dreams are becoming reality."

He chuckles at me and responds, "That is not true, Asato. I am here and talking to you [in your miiind. Or then I just spontaneously read you thoughts again. You choose!]."

Raising a shaking hand and touching his shoulder, I yell [AAAHHH! IT'S MADE OF SILK!] as I jump into his arms, "Kazutaka! You're back!"

He whispers in my ear, "Yes, I am back, my love. I will never leave you. Never again." [I'm so happy for you I could vomit.]

[For those of you who like numbers: Ketessa went from 77 Sue points to 144 in this chapter. I'm pretty sure that makes her at least the assistant director of all Sues.]

The next chapter is the last one. Thank the lord of dance.

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